With the increase in the age at which couples have children today, which already exceeds 31 years on average in the case of women, many couples see the years go by without getting pregnant and end up looking for other options to Be parents.
An alternative is to look for egg or sperm donation if the problem lies in one of the two and another alternative is adoption. There are couples who prefer the one, there are couples who prefer the other and there are couples in which one prefers the one and the other the other. That is why I want to comment a little on these two options for when pregnancy does not arrive: Adopt or go to an ovum or semen bank?
Adoption
Adopting a child is free in Spain, but it is a complicated process that often does not end up happening and that is why many couples choose to make an international adoption, faster, although with the consequent expense. The child, obviously, has already been born and will have when receiving it a variable age (sometimes they are more babies, sometimes they have more than one year) and a variable sex. Come on you cannot choose sex or age, but the preference can be expressed in case it could be addressed. Thus, only couples with less than 40 years of age may adopt babies under one year old. Once he is 41 years old the child will be at least 1 year old, if they are 42 years old the child will be at least 2 years old and so on.
Fertilization with ovules and / or donor sperm
Until a while ago fertilization techniques and associated medications were paid for by social security, but for a few months this has changed, the obstacles are greater to be able to access it (I understand that medications are no longer prescribed) and, In any case, many couples chose to take out medical insurance that would allow them to do so more quickly than waiting to receive a call from public services. With this option the baby is born in the mother's body, who can be a biological mother if it is with her eggs or not, if the eggs are donated. Sex cannot be chosen either.
What is better?
Well, none of the options are better or worse. They are different options and as such they have to be treated. For women, psychologically speaking, the option of fertilization may be better, if their desire is that of gestate a baby inside and give birth. Many have doubts about how they will accept to gestate a baby whose genetic load comes from a bank, by one donor or another, but from fertility clinics they usually ensure that once they achieve pregnancy the joy is so immense that importance is no longer given to the baby's origin
Other women, on the other hand, consider that it is not necessary to gestate a baby and if they cannot have a biological child they prefer to opt for adoption, to give shelter and care for an already born child who has no parents. Both options are equally respectable and the decision must be made by both.
As for parents (dads), there are also those who prefer one thing to another, but it is a little different because in reality dads do not touch anything. That is to say, neither we are pregnant nor giving birth, so on many occasions we leave the decision more in the option of the mother because, for example, it would be a bit absurd to prefer pregnancy if the woman prefers to adopt.
And if there is no consensus?
It may happen that the father wants to adopt a child and that the mother prefers to try fertilization techniques. In cases like this you have to look for a unique decision, try to weigh the pros and cons and look for a common choice. If this is not possible, you can always choose to choose both options: carry out the adoption procedures and at the same time carry out the procedures to achieve pregnancy through fertilization.
It is possible that one of the two paths bears fruit before the other and then the couple is raised there, or it is possible that both of them grow and the couple decides, why not, move on with the two children (Although in case of pregnancy, adoption is usually paralyzed until the baby is born and is already a few months old).
In fact, it may even happen that it ends up arriving a child by natural pregnancy. It would not be the first time that a couple has a biological child just when they were already clear that something like this would never happen.
