Isn't it true that when you read the entry we wrote two days ago explaining that a study confirmed that babies behave worse with their mothers, did you think it was true?
Don't worry, you're not the only one. I also believed it, like thousands of people who shared it and hundreds of pages that, like us, explained the news and spread it. As well, the study has turned out to be false, a joke from the Mom news daily page to which many of us are still trying to find grace.
Everything implied that it was true (or almost everything)
It wasn't April Fools' Day, it wasn't the April Fool's Day nor was it the day of "let's invent a studio and spend a joke". Because besides, if you try to play a joke, you make up a surreal story, something that surprises, something that makes people say "Go on, that can't be true! Or does it? Is it true or is it a lie?", And not something that, as we said, only confirmed something we all already know: that babies change behavior according to who they are with.
So that's why, when I learned that everything was a joke, I was left with the face of "well, but I don't understand it", because it makes no sense or any grace.
They published an entry saying that the University of Washington had conducted the study, that the researcher, KP Leibowitz, had taken a sample of 500 families and observed the reaction of children to different situations. They left us with their words and even with statements of families who had participated in the study. Everything implied that it was true, because there was nothing weird about it all.
The only thing that made me doubt was not being able to find the publication. Whenever I speak of studies I look for the original to read what it says and to offer the link, but in this case I was not able to find it. In fact, looking for the author's last name, some related publications appeared (come on, there are Leibowitz surnamed researchers studying human behavior). Thinking that it would be published later or that the problem was simply mine, that I did not find it, I decided to trust the page and so many others that had been disseminated, and publish the entry.
Now, two days later, I find out through Dads and children, who contacted an editor on that page, who everything was a lie.
But children do behave differently with people.
So is. I explained it as a "confirms", because it has happened to all parents, or because we know people who explain it. Who does not know someone who tells you that their children, with grandparents, behave great? Or that they go out and everyone says how good they are and they answer that "yes, if you saw them at home you wouldn't say the same"?
Even at school, as I explained my case, where my children are model children and then, at home, show themselves as they really are: children. And there I leave it. Children. I could say terrible children, little devils, monsters in formation, but no. They are children, and when they are with their parents, in a climate of trust, they do not have to act in any way, but simply be as they are.
That they behave badly, they cry, they stick, they scream and they make tantrums? Sure, This is how children are many times when they don't like something or when they don't do what they want you to do. At school they are with many more people and although they sometimes have moments like that, they don't have so much time or much prominence to do it (besides, the teachers don't think they pay attention to them as much as a mother or a father can do), so it is at home when they demand and where more conflicts are generated.
With us they are children and with us they use the tools they have and know to try to get what they want. And I don't say it wrong. I do not say it in a negative and derogatory way in a "manipulated" plan, but quite the opposite. They are learning to try to get what they think they need. Is it so learning to think. They are learning to meet their needs, just as we try to meet ours in our own way.
Y is positive Let them do it because, as I say, they think and learn how to achieve their goals. If in between you consider that it is happening, that it is behaving very badly, that it is hurting you, that it is very capricious and does not stop asking for things, it's time to review your relationship. A happy child, a child who feels loved, a child who spends a lot of time with his parents and who has a healthy relationship with them does not need to call attention, shout, or behave badly, or demand that he Buy this or that thing continuously (you may be interested in reading the entry "Children, love and materialism"). It will have its moments, of course, but nothing that makes you think that your child is impossible.
If that happens, it's time to change something. Maybe now you're less with him? Maybe something has changed in your life? Perhaps you are not acting as a mother (or father) and leave all the decisions to him, when he is asking you to become a mother and take them for him? Maybe he has problems with other people or in other environments and is trying to let you know like this? Think, inquire, find out, because if a child is changing, if he doesn't have a good relationship with you, he is telling you, without words, that "I need you to listen to me, understand me and do something about it".
Thanks to Mom News Daily
I just thanked Mom news daily for inventing this study, because thanks to them I had the opportunity to talk about children, parents and their behavior in two entries, in the previous one and in this one, and leave like this some tips for those parents who are having a bad time with their children and that they enter into a spiral of screams, threats and punishments when what they have to do is the opposite, find a way to get closer to the heart of your children and find the error, the failure, the event that initiated the relationship began to deteriorate, and remedy.
Thanks, but don't do it again, please. The study is false but as a joke it is absurd, because it might well have been true. Come on, I am sure that if someone is dedicated to studying babies and children in different contexts, they will get the same conclusions, that the behavior with the closest people is not the same as with less known people. I didn't know your page and it was the first time I had read it. The first and the last, Sure.
Photos | iStock
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